Everyone wants to have a good time at the baseball yard. You spent enough to be there, so you should. But, it’s important to remember that the ballpark is not your own personal media room fitted with 60 inch 4K LED screen, reclining chair plus foot rest, cup holders, snack trays and mood lighting.
There is etiquette and common courtesy to follow. Most of which should be obvious when you’re sharing a space with thousands of other people.
It’s possible that your neighbour isn’t interested in your own personal play-by-play of the game. If so, they’d probably be at home watching the actual broadcast on their TV. Engaging in friendly conversation, commenting on great plays, cheering and clapping… good. Narrating events on the field like a know-it-all auctioneer… bad.
We’re not all going to be fans of the same team. The least we can do is be civil sitting beside each other, unless of course you’re an obnoxious Yankee fan shoving the #27 in my face. Then don’t be surprised if I continually glare at you with such disdain that even Jose Bautista would be proud. Better a stare down match than a full on brawl, where there’s more attention being paid to what’s going on in the stands than on the field.
Public restrooms are sometimes a dreaded necessity. In a perfect world, I’d prefer to not use them. But, there are times when they bring welcome relief. If I must, I’d like to think I’m not walking into porta-potty, swamp hell. There’s no such thing as a polite mess. Try to leave it as clean as you found it… for the next person.
If you can’t control your alcohol consumption, is sitting up on the 5th deck watching a live baseball game really the best place for you to be? Especially, when chucking beer down to field level is your idea of a good time. Maybe you and your media room need to spend more alone time together.
Don’t interfere with a live ball in play. Which brings us to the next point…
Pay attention. We all want to share the experience of being at the game on social media, but if you’re constantly looking down at your phone, you’re probably going to miss something special. Even worse, you may not be able to defend yourself from a ball being hit into the stands.
I know what it’s like to have long legs and them be cramped because I’m sitting in an awkward position. That doesn’t mean you should kick the back of the chair in front of you, in an effort to stretch them out. Get up and go for a walk. Ballpark concourses are full of interesting vantage points (and TV monitors) where you can stretch your legs and still watch the game.
Some people are just world class hecklers. It’s their way of contributing to the action. But, keep it clean and tasteful. Crowds are getting younger and more diverse. There are a ton of kids and new fans around. Don’t be that jerk.
If you’re one of those people who after every half inning is up out of their seat and off to the washroom, or on a beer run… be polite about it. Don’t attempt to jump over someone’s legs. Give them an opportunity to stand up and clear a path for you to cozy on by. And better yet, because they’re being a good sport, maybe also offer to buy them a drink.
Why did the wave ever become a thing? Standing up with your arms raised above your head, mimicking a wave pattern along with everyone in your section. Around and around the park it goes. It’s free, but that doesn’t mean you should do it. I wish something would come along to replace the wave. But, then we’d probably complain about the crowd doing that new thing. The wave is way past its prime, but if you must, don’t do it when the home team is batting. Or when the game is close. Or ever.
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